My journey to this blog post has not been an easy one! I have been diagnosed for the past 15 years with Depressive Disorder. Wow, that feels good to put it out in the open. It’s been my deepest secrets. But no more! I am ready to come out and say that I am depressed and I struggle with this illness day in and day out. Everyday…it does not go away. Well, I should further explain.
My name is Esther, and I was diagnosed with depression in 2000. at that time I believed it was a pile of Poop and a good way to send me home! Hispanics don’t get depression. Does he know who I am?! My ignorance was undeniable, I did not think it was possible. I was 18 for goodness sakes!!! Fast forward a withdrawn early adulthood, a chaotic wife era, and the inability to maintain employment situation that I find myself in now (15 years later), and Lord, I finally became a believer.
My symptoms have increased and my disability has now taken over my life. for the past 6 years. I have been dx with major depressive disorder with anxiety and MANY Panic attacks. Maybe I could have done something different, should have, could have, would have…if I only had a time machine. but here I sit!! What can I do Now!! Well, I turn to all of you for help.
I go thru spurts where I am happy and I can hold a job and all of a sudden the next three to six months will be hell. I can not work, shower, craft, facebook, cook, and so much more. I am beginning to think I have been diagnosed incorrectly or that my diagnosis is changing. I struggle day in and out, and I am wondering if there is anyone out there that would like to talk, share stories, of what real depression looks like.
In my core, I know that scrapbooking is the way to heal, however, how can I craft when I am depressed. If you haven’t caught one I have a silly sense of humor, even though I am depressed, which is a huge reason I did not believe that I was depressed? I have come to terms that depressed people can laugh, giggle and craft.
In honor of my coming out of the depressed closet, I would like to share my latest layouts.
Please share any advice you might have for me as to dealing with depression in creative ways. I am challenging myself to do different things that can help. Thank you!