The depressed scrapbooker

My journey to this blog post has not been an easy one! I have been diagnosed for the past 15 years with Depressive Disorder. Wow, that feels good to put it out in the open. It’s been my deepest secrets. But no more! I am ready to come out and say that I am depressed and I struggle with this illness day in and day out. Everyday…it does not go away. Well, I should further explain.

My name is Esther, and I was diagnosed with depression in 2000. at that time I believed it was a pile of Poop and a good way to send me home! Hispanics don’t get depression. Does he know who I am?! My ignorance was undeniable, I did not think it was possible. I was 18 for goodness sakes!!! Fast forward a withdrawn early adulthood, a chaotic wife era, and the inability to maintain employment situation that I find myself in now (15 years later), and Lord, I finally became a believer.

My symptoms have increased and my disability has now taken over my life. for the past 6 years. I have been dx with major depressive disorder with anxiety and MANY Panic attacks. Maybe I could have done something different, should have, could have, would have…if I only had a time machine.  but here I sit!! What can I do Now!! Well, I turn to all of you for help.

I go thru spurts where I am happy and I can hold a job and all of a sudden the next three to six months will be hell. I can not work, shower, craft, facebook, cook, and so much more. I am beginning to think I have been diagnosed incorrectly or that my diagnosis is changing. I struggle day in and out, and I am wondering if there is anyone out there that would like to talk, share stories, of what real depression looks like.

In my core, I know that scrapbooking is the way to heal, however, how can I craft when I am depressed. If you haven’t caught one I have a silly sense of humor, even though I am depressed, which is a huge reason I did not believe that I was depressed? I have come to terms that depressed people can laugh, giggle and craft.

In honor of my coming out of the depressed closet, I would like to share my latest layouts. 

Please share any advice you might have for me as to dealing with depression in creative ways. I am challenging myself to do different things that can help. Thank you! 

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13 thoughts on “The depressed scrapbooker

  1. I totally understand everything you are going through. I was diagnosed over 20 years ago with severe depression. I’ve always been a crafter but it is very hard to do anything when you are depressed. I found that I have to really force myself to get up and do something, anything!! One thing I try to do when it’s really bad is to make a small list with only ONE thing to per day. Even if it’s just pick out the pictures I want to use in my next layout, or sort through my supplies. Doing anything creative really does help!! Using that part of your brain releases happy hormones! Try it. Just one small thing every day. Hope that helps. hugs
    Mary

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am so glad the secret is out. Today i accomplished so much and I pushed thru the rough times. I am feelings the community love, and it makes me so happy to not be alone. Brings me to tears.

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  2. Hearing about others who struggle with depression and anxiety like me makes me sort of happy.. It feels so good to know that I’m not alone in this❤️ I also craft the most when i am “at my worst”, when i am at my darkest i really enjoy to paint cuz i feel like i somehow get all the bad out thru the paintbrush! We are not alone❤️ *sending virtual hugs*

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thanks for sharing your story – if I could suggest taking a short walk? Good for the mind but if you can aim to find some inspiration in what you see around you this may help? Not sure….your layouts are lovely!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thank you all for sharing. I am a therapist that loves to scrap and a creative thing to do is journal in scrappy fashion your moods ffeeling and find it there is a pattern. If so you can prepare your self ahead of time. Be blessed

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: 5 Ways I use Gelatos to Deal with my Depression | Scrappin Hard- Adventures

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